Life Is Better

There are certain things in my life that don't quite make the cut onto the Things I Love list. However, the following things I really, really like and they make my life SO much better than it otherwise would be.

Big Girl Panties - Seriously, my friends are just lying out of their asses when they try to convince me that having a piece of dental floss stuck in their crack all day is more comfortable than NORMAL panties. If you are that against panty lines, just go commando. It's not like your thong is doing anything anyway, wedged as it is between your labia majora and labia minora.

My Minivan - You have NOT lived until you've pulled up to the car pool drop off spot and pushed a button that ejects your children and then closes the door again without the threat of someone's hand being lobbed off. I do not need that drama at 7:45 AM. Furthermore, when picking up said children I do not have to Houdini myself into the backseat to open the door... no one wants to see my ass stuck in the windshield while trying to open the back door for my kids.

A perfectly toasted egg bagel with real vegtable cream cheese made at the REAL Jewish Deli that is on my way to work.

Dancing with the Stars - I know.... I can't explain it.

Cowboys Football

My flat iron - I cannot believe I spent all that money in the 80's perming my naturally straight hair... NOW I spend my time straighting my wavy hair that is really grey under the hair color. That timing really could have been better.

Underwire bras - we've already established my need for this product.

Technology - my digital camera, the internet, email, my cell phone, cable, Gameboys and Game Cubes (what did our parents do when we got on their nerves?) DVD's and the DVD player in my MINIVAN.

Tim McGraw - yum

Bare Minerals Makeup

Glide Dental Floss - I cannot imagine how grumpy I would be if I had to go around my who life with crap stuck between my teeth.

Joyce Meyer - who tells it like it is

The remote control

My maid - not because she cleans my house but because she makes life bearable for my husband who is the Felix of our odd couple.

My Schwan's Man - Dusty, you keep my family fed and I'm CONFIDENT I do my part in keeping yours fed.